So it occured to me that I need to be less of an organizer and more of a spiritualist. So I set out in the large city of Chicago to find a coven.
I started by organizing my thoughts. What was I looking for when looking for a coven? I fell that my list should reflect my personal beliefs and because I take my beliefs seriously, I should look for a coven that fits ALL of my requirements. Here's my list:
1) Balanced Duality-I wasn't looking for Goddess centered religion-I never have. I always felt, regardless of how suppressed women were and still are in our culture, delving only into women's mysteries is only half the picture. We as humans have both positive and negative, male and female energies within us. After all, we both have a mother and a father (no clones as of yet). Therefore, we should honor both male and female. So out went covens like (Fellowship of Isis, Covenant of the Goddess, and so forth and so on.)
2) Structured, but not restrictive-I don't want some pompous ass who thinks he/she's all that telling me how to walk my path from the beginning. I already have a path and I'm fine with it. I simply want company. I want a circle of people who will invite me as an equal, not a peon. (So out went a bunch of other covens whom I won't mention. Let's just say I've met their HPS and said "Hel no!")
3) Tolerant and Open-Minded: No BTW covens and no racism, sexism or any other bullshit. BTW covens largely have their heads up their asses still following Gardner's debunked Murray info and not jumping into the modern age of healthy Wiccan eclecticism. Can you believe there are covens that both exclude women and exclude homosexuals. My gay friends are some of the most spiritual people I've ever met. I'd never dream of kicking them out. (Out went all the covens that would hate my guts.)
4) No exhuberant dues-I'm all for helping out with costs, but I'm not paying for someone else to not have a job. Yes, running a coven is work, and if the coven is big enough, a small stipend from everyone should pay for the HP/HPS to do their duty full time. If they charge an arm and a leg, I think it's more of a scam than a coven.
5) No Fluffy Bunniness-No people claiming they can shoot fireballs. No John Edwards "Crossing Over" bullshit. None of that. I believe in critical thinking. If people are more emotional that intelligible, it's just a game to them and I won't be a part of making a mockery of the divine. (So some of the more prominent covens, which will also remain nameless, are off the list.)
So I don't think this list was too much to ask for. But yet, I am now covenless. I systematically ruled out EVERY coven in the Chicagoland area.
So what am I left with? It kind of reminds me of that Neil Diamond song "Solitary Man," except instead of Man, it should say Wiccan. But I want community so bad. I want other Wiccans who not necessarily think like me, but think for themselves!
Uggh, so I'm stuck having to form my own. Something I did not want to do. I wanted to go through the process. I wanted to grow with an established group. I still feel that I'm Wiccan, but just saddened at the state of distress my religion is in.
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3 comments:
See, I like this analysis and you brought up some very good points about organized witchcraft [ or even occult groups] who may charge too much, be imbalanced, or not offer what you are looking for.
You definitely have the leadership skills, the knowledge, and the wisdom to start your own coven, and by reviewing all of these things that motivate you to *not* be in a coven you've made a good point : If you can't find what you are looking for, then make it yourself!
I've struggled with the same things over the years. It would be great to be in a group that had similar beliefs as me, but the situations were never right; either I didn't like their beliefs or methods, they didn't do things in a 'traditional' way, the cost was too much [200/lifetime membership in the COS!] and for these reasons, I have decided to be a solitary practitioner of my art.
In my field, as you know, solitary practice is just as favorable as belonging to a group, but for paths like Wicca group participation seems like the best way.
I just started following your blog and so far its great.
Thanks, I'm glad you like it. I'm glad I'm not alone.
I think that with any group you will have problems. Even in social circles. I'm sure everyone has fallen victim to a friend who is known as a "moocher". Give a little and then they want this, they need that. There are others, like the one that likes to take things over. The drama queen, damn are those fun. That's just a few.
People are hard to get a long with sometimes, which is why I will probably always be a solitary. And some people are just fuckin strange, which has been a lot of my experience. I'm not sure what it is about paganism in general that seems to attract weirdos like flies on shit,but sometimes, I just have laugh. Where do these people come from?
Anyway, don't you worry, I'm sure you'll find a great group of people soon.
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